Feb, 3, 2003 - We Will Never Forget

April 5, 1962 ~~ February, 2003

"what we once enjoyed and deeply loved we can never lose . . . for all that we love deeply becomes a part of us." Helen Keller

The Time: 2:21 AM

The Place: The House of Blues

The relentlessly cheerful California girl, still dreaming of stardom, despite years of restaurant work and trashy TV roles clocked out of the Hollywood hot spot and reluctantly climbs into a limousine for "one drink only" at Phil Spector's "1930s Moorish castle" on the fringes of LA. DON'T GO LANA DON'T GO

Some said if Phil had had his usual driver, nothing would have happened. His usual driver would have said, "No, Phil, you promised," when he ordered a drink at the Grill early that evening; he would have said, "Come on, Phil, no drinking," when he ordered another one at Dan Tana's; he would have said, "Phil, you know how you get," and taken the next one away from him when they went to Trader Vic's. And later when Phil was downing Bacardi 150's and champagne at the House of Blues, the driver would have said, "OK, buddy, I'm taking you home now," and then later that night, when the gun went off, the driver would have said, "No problem, I'll take care of it". DON'T GO LANA DON'T GO

But instead Spector came out of his castle, gun in hand, and said to the substitute limo driver, "I think I just killed someone". Perhaps we will never know at what point the gun was drawn, who produced it, or why. We wonder what difference that makes in the scheme of things anyway. DON'T GO LANA DON'T GO

But we do know this special lady was shot in the face and when authorities arrived, Lana was dead as she sat waiting to leave, lying in a pool of blood in the marble foyer, while Phil Spector wandered about his house washing his hands and churning alibis, as the essence of life drained from her lovely body. DON'T GO LANA DON'T GO

Spector's long history - forever angry, selfish, impulsive, manipulative, depraved, indulged, appeased, self-centred, grandiose, pleasured by guns, and violent abuse of women was well-known in that strange place called Hollywood. Phil has never once been held publicly accountable for his actions. And because of his unaccountability how could Lana have imagined what lay ahead? DON'T GO LANA DON'T GO

Five years after the beast dragged the beauty to his lair on that winter night five years ago, little could she have known, he would finally snap ~ unable to handle his liquor, refusing to abide a simple rejection, one more door closing, one more pair of lovely footsteps skittering away, that there was so much to fear. DON'T GO LANA DON'T GO

This son of Satan, master of madness, demon of depravity, who would make the Marquise de Sade proud, still walks the halls of his Castle a free man. Manipulation of the system, countless legal tricks, he is still free. And those who loved the real Lana Clarkson sit and wait. Wait for the Justice that has to happen. Doesn't it? DON'T GO LANA DON'T GO

Among those who knew and loved the real Lana Clarkson, some mysteriously woke up at 2:21 AM, others didn't sleep at all. But all of us stand together to demand Justice. We will not forget, we will not rest until he sits behind bars and pays for distinguishing the light that was Lana. DON'T GO LANA DON'T GO

We light candles for Lana at: http://www.gratefulness.org/candles/candles.cfm?l=eng&gi=lana

One special personal friend of Lana remembers with these lyrics:

Not Ready To Make Nice - Lyrics/Dixie Chicks

Forgive, sounds good
Forget, I’m not sure I could
They say time heals everything
But I’m still waiting

I’m through with doubt
There’s nothing left for me to figure out
I’ve paid a price
And I’ll keep paying

I’m not ready to make nice
I’m not ready to back down
I’m still mad as hell and
I don’t have time to go round and round and round
It’s too late to make it right
I probably wouldn’t if I could
‘Cause I’m mad as hell
Can’t bring myself to do what it is you think I should

I know you said
Can’t you just get over it
It turned my whole world around
And I kind of like it

I made my bed and I sleep like a baby
With no regrets and I don’t mind sayin’
It’s a sad sad story when a mother will teach her
Daughter that she ought to hate a perfect stranger
And how in the world can the words that I said
Send somebody so over the edge
That they’d write me a letter
Sayin’ that I better shut up and sing
Or my life will be over

I’m not ready to make nice
I’m not ready to back down
I’m still mad as hell and
I don’t have time to go round and round and round
It’s too late to make it right
I probably wouldn’t if I could
‘Cause I’m mad as hell
Can’t bring myself to do what it is you think I should

I’m not ready to make nice
I’m not ready to back down
I’m still mad as hell and
I don’t have time to go round and round and round
It’s too late to make it right
I probably wouldn’t if I could
‘Cause I’m mad as hell
Can’t bring myself to do what it is you think I should

Forgive, sounds good
Forget, I’m not sure I could
They say time heals everything
But I’m still waiting.

UNTIL THERE IS JUSTICE WE WON'T GO LANA ~~ WE WON'T GO

What Ties Us Together

A curious phenomenon has taken place. Strangers, who first came together on the Internet to discuss the Phil Spector trial, then went on to an unhappy private message board (previously discussed in earlier posts), and then fleeing from that nightmare, have found real friendship. Not lifelong, agree-with-everything-you-say, practically siblings' friendship, but real friendship nonetheless.

It's fascinating that so many have coaleced the way we have in this short time. It was that trial for the unnecessary murder of Lana Clarkson that brought us together. It was the terrible non-outcome that kept us focused on the injustice of a mistrial, of a hung jury that was caused by one rogue juror and eight others who couldn't make a dent on his concrete - or contrarian - mind.

We are from everywhere - east, west, north south, the middle of the country and Canada too. Big cities, small towns, urban and rural. We are politically and religiously disparate; we have various levels of formal education; different levels of incomes. We are a true snapshot of free-thinking individuals.

Medicine, insurance, sales, law, entertainment, farmers; there are full-time moms, grandmothers, and retirees, at least one person has returned to school, one is looking for a new career, and some are retirees.

There are many issues we don't all agree on and some that aren't really discussed much at all. Occasionally someone will mention attending church or praying or not believing in anything, but for the most part, we are all mature and smart enough to have made our own spiritual choices . We don't feel the need to foist our personal beliefs off on other people.

Politics do come up, inevitably in this primary season - or would that be this primary decade. We represent a broad canvas of opinions and affiliations, and there is one uniting feature: not one of us seems to be happy with anyone or anything currently offered in the political arena. There may be some who hold out hope for this country, but many of us have been too repeatedly disappointed, angry, and disenfranchised to feel that way.

Only today we were having a discussion about this, and as posters dropped in and out giving their perspectives and opinions, it became crystal clear that all of us are worried about the future of our Nation. Even if we disagree on the solutions, we respect one another, and each individual's outlook and beliefs.

The uniting factor, the real glue that binds us seems to be the desire for a lawful society, a society of justice that protects, and when appropriate makes sure criminals are punished. We are also bonded by anger at the inequity of a system that seems to favor the defendant over the victim. The mere allowance of a "defense" consisting of denigration and marginalization of the victim is simply unacceptable.

We wonder how can it be right that a real human being, who once was flesh and blood, loved and needed by others, is now viewed as last week's news ad yesterdays trash.

The Phil Spector defense team tried best to muddy the truth - and only intermittently succeeded thanks to a no-nonsense judge - to turn Lana Clarkson into a cliché of an aging actress who couldn't deal with the passage of time or lack of success. Nice try sleaze artists!

We utterly reject your efforts. Lana Clarkson was a vibrant, beautiful, smart, caring woman, a working actress, who struggled with the same challenges that affect us all. Who doesn't doubt their own level of success, who doesn't reach forty without getting a shiver of what lies ahead? Who doesn't get sad or overwhelmed or lonely from time to time?

Lana Clarkson paid with her life for not knowing who she was dealing with. Not knowing this creepy, evil little man was capable of total disregard of life for his own convenience or pleasure. This cataclysm should not have happened. It also should not go unpunished for these five long years.

There is no conclusion to this blog entry - these are just my thoughts on a rainy afternoon. I marvel at the way this group has come into being and continues to keep rolling along as various issues and events come and go. This is a safe, smart place. It is comfortable to voice an opinion. There is mutual respect, courtesy and honesty here. As a group we are remarkably articulate, and both very funny and very kind. And more than anything else, we are ethical. We are who we are, say what we mean, mean what we say. There is no pretense, no deceit, and no underlying agenda.

I wonder what Lana Clarkson would think if she could see what her tragic death has set into motion? This is one time I wish I believed in an hereafter, because I would love to think that somehow she knows how an amazing group of strangers found each other and continue to honor her spirit. Thank you Lana.

Ambition and Technology – Sew High a Price

Trial Bloggers vie for position in the trial gallery, assuming their self-important bloviating will be validated by where they sit, who they speak to, and who may deign to acknowledge them.

One Blogger jostles positions and draws attention with false friendliness and advice for the technically challenged in this brave new kind of courtroom.

Reported: The Judge smiles at the Blogger. Twice!

Reported: The Blogger hears that the Prosecutor is following the Blog's observations closely. It must be true because he walks into Court daily with a huge smile and wink directly to the Blogger.

Reported: The Defense team assigns a monitor to the Blog and the Message Boards for ideas on tactics.

How much of this is real? Impossible to know since much of it may be rumor, and friendly greetings may be just that – friendly greetings to a familiar face.

Reported: Families of the victim have asked not to be bothered by anyone, but they are in close contact with the Blogger away from the scene. There is a measure of comfort in the support for them that the Blogger reflects an honest mirror in a sea of misdirection. When the Blogger is banned from the Message Boards the family is bereft at the loss of those postings. They now have to rely on the Blog alone.

Reported: Dominick Dunne seems to accept, even enjoy the Blogger's camaraderie.
Also reported by someone who was an actual witness to events: "Dominick Dunne did not have any interest in the Blogger. He actually used her from time to time as an unpaid gopher. It was not buddy-buddy as you might be led to believe."

Reported: Jurors seek out the Blogger after the trial to correct a wrong impression.

If a Blogger can make you "believe" will it not feed the feeling of importance that Narcissistic Personality Disorder craves?

It's all going so well. The Blogger ascends the ladder, moves to the back row, where the "up-to-the minute reporters" sit with BlackBerry's and laptops. Sitting in the coveted – and in this curious world, reported on - back row, the Blogger's ambition is fulfilled. Prominence, recognition, the right to preen.

As the testimony happens, the Blogger is on the spot. The readers will get the scoop immediately and direct. The readers respond, "You are the BEST!" They hang on every word, share thoughts and feelings about every observation.

Interestingly, another crime is taking place right there in the Court.

What would law enforcement, prosecutors, jurors, and families on both sides think if it was revealed that the Blogger's sudden technological ability, this in-the-moment reporting is due to an associate devising a way for the Blogger's new Wi-Fi connection to be stolen from a provider?

And if the Blogger is willing to resort to that kind of dishonesty, how much of what they have reported and will report can be believed?

From Imaginary case-within-case files: Theft is reported and the Blogger is escorted from the gallery of the murder trial to face criminal charges of a different kind. Read on if you think this is impossible.

Tapping into Other's Wi-Fi Can Get You Arrested

Have you ever been someplace besides your home or office with the old laptop in hand and attempted to "sniff out" a Wi-Fi access so you can get online? A hotel, a coffee shop, the doctor's office, the airport, or even Courtroom? Well you better be careful in the future, because apparently stealing tapping into a Wi-Fi connection that you do not have authorization to do so can get you arrested.

Michigan resident Sam Peterson was arrested after he was caught repeatedly stealing Wi-Fi from a cafe. Mr. Peterson was arrested under a Michigan law barring access to anyone else's network without authorization. The complaint reasons that since the cafe's Wi-Fi network was reserved for (paying) customers and Peterson never came into the cafe, he was essentially piggybacking off of the open network without authorization.

From the original story:

The arrest came about because Peterson apparently showed up to the Union Street Cafe to use its free Wi-Fi from the comfort of his car, and he did so every single day. A police officer grew suspicious of Peterson and eventually questioned him as to what he was up to. Peterson, not realizing that what he was doing was (at least) ethically questionable, told the officer exactly what he was doing. "I knew that the Union Street had Wi-Fi. I just went down and checked my e-mail and didn't see a problem with that," Peterson told a reporter.

Peterson's actions could result in a five-year felony and a $10,000 fine. Ouch!

It's very lucky for Peterson that prosecutors don't plan on making an example of him. Instead, he will have to pay a $400 fine and complete 40 hours of community service. I wonder if the amount of Internet access he stole borrowed comes close to the fine and hours he has to put in?

So next time you decide to tap into someone else's Wi-Fi connection, better check and see what the law says about it. Oh and if you do it, better not brag to people you intend to crap on either.

As Sir Walter Scott observed, "Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive."

The word deceive implies that the deceiver knows that what he/she is doing is wrong – immoral or illegal. Replace the word deceiver with the word Blogger and think about it.

Thoughts on Sunday Bloody Sunday

Scott Peterson, O.J. Simpson, Phil Spector, Bobby Cutts, Drew Peterson, Cesar Armando Laurean - how many more?

WHY? WHY? WHY?

BECAUSE THEY WANTED TO!

Laci Peterson. Kathleen Peterson. Almost certainly Stacy Peterson. Nicole Simpson. Lana Clarkson. Christa Worthington. Those are just the famous ones. Maria Lauterbach. Amina Yaser Said. Sarah Yaser Said. Those are just the most recent "newsworthy” ones.

Fact: Women Murdered in the U.S in 2000 - recent yearly statistics available from the U.S. Department of Justice - more than 33 percent were killed by an intimate partner.

Fact: Nationally, homicide is a leading killer of young women—pregnant or not.

Must have missed the memo, because I thought we were supposed to be a civilized society, striving for improvement. We were supposed to be kind towards one other. War or attack aside, we were certainly not supposed to annihilate other human beings.

Instead, we seem to be in a place and time of unprecedented violence towards women and children. In a society that is completely hit-and-miss when it comes to convicting, imprisoning, or punishing the murderers.

Maybe it was always like this, but has the need to hammer it home for the 24 hour ratings-grabbing media reporting changed the program? It certainly feels as if our society has descended into some sort of collective psychosis - a violent whirlpool of rage, entitlement, and devaluation of human life.

Turn on any crime show (and I confess I watch some of them) and there are literally nonstop images of - mostly - women and young girls bound, tortured, pleading for their lives from behind their gags. Yes, the heroes and heroines are working feverishly to rescue these victims, but the camera always cuts back to those victims. And of course, women and children are much easier to target and victimize, on screen and off.

Have we become immune to the horrors of these acts and these images? I don't want to believe that this is what entertainment is, or that we have become a society so intellectually and spiritually impoverished that we think that as entertainment goes, so real life must follow.

Walking my dogs this morning, I had to pull hard to stop Sabre, an 80 lb. ball of fur, from going after a rabbit. That is instinct. Sabre doesn't see the rabbit as a living breathing creature with rights equal to his.

Humans are supposed to be more highly evolved. But if there is anything like an ethical evolutionary scale, we, the Human Race, are cashing in the chips, calling it a loss, and relegating ourselves to the lowest possible level imaginable.

From W.B. Yeats' poem "Slouching Towards Bethlehem": . . .

Things fall apart; the center cannot hold.
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst Are full of passionate intensity. . .

What wouldn't I give to disagree with Yeats?